Laura Beckett – Personal Testimony

  

 

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Even before I was born, God showed His ultimate grace and mercy towards me. When I arrived into this world, I arrived into a family who gave God His place in their lives – first priority. This in itself was a great privilege.

The Bible became a constant presence in my life.  I read it with my family every morning before going off to school and again after supper.  It was read in my Sunday school classes and at every gospel meeting I attended.  I understood at a young age the basics of the Gospel – that I was born a sinner and my ONLY hope of ever being in Heaven was through the Lord Jesus Christ, who came to this world for one purpose – to die for the sins of the world.  He is our salvation.

 

“For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.”  John 3:16

 

Although, I was taught and understood the basics of the Gospel, it wasn’t until my early teenage years that I came to grips with my sin and where my sin was taking me. 

 

At age 13, I made a false profession.  One of the (many) faults I have is being a people pleaser and that was exactly what I was doing.  People were asking me why I wasn’t saved so I decided to see if I could understand this salvation and then people would be happy for me and then leave me alone.  I read the story about the jailer in Acts 2 where the jailer asks the Apostle Paul how to be saved.  Paul’s response was “Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved.”  Acts 2:16   My thinking was, I believe Jesus, therefore I must be saved.  I had no understanding of why I needed salvation and no understanding of what I was being saved from.  I had heard many conversion stories in my 13 years of life and I knew that once a person is saved; there is a change in their life.

 

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.”  1 Corinthians 5:17

 

I knew I didn’t have that, but to avoid disappointing family and friends I went along with this false profession for the next 3 years. 

 

As a child brought up reading the Bible, I knew about the Second Coming of Christ.  This is when the Lord Jesus comes back to this world to take His people who have trusted in Him back to Heaven.  This was a subject that made me frantic if I dwelt on it long enough.  It was because of this subject, in January 1999, my pride was finally broken.  I had been too proud to break down and admit that if I was to die or if the Lord came back; my destination would be Hell because my sin was taking me there. 

 

It was a Sunday night; sitting in a gospel meeting at the Sussex Gospel Hall, a man named Fidalas Harrison was speaking on the Second Coming of Christ.  I made a decision sitting in the chair that I was going to get this settled once and for all.  I wanted to know FOR SURE that if I died or if the Lord came back I would be in Heaven.  The meeting ended much too quickly and I got off my chair still unsettled.  I put my unsettled thoughts to the back burner and went out with a few friends for coffee.   Once I got home, my mind went back to the gospel meeting.  I immediately opened my Bible searching for verses.  I wanted it for real this time.  No faking.  Searching and searching for verses to help me but finding nothing.  I prayed but I didn’t hear anything.  After all this, I fell asleep in tears.

 

Monday morning I debated about staying home from school but I was still too proud to show Mom that I was searching for salvation so off I went to school.

 

After a horrible day at school, I came home and locked myself in my room.  I was tired of looking and finding nothing.  Couldn’t God see me down here searching for Him?  I was searching but was coming up with nothing.  I was getting very frustrated to the point I was getting angry at God.  Why wouldn’t God save me?  I was a good person!  I had been flipping through the book of Romans.  I came to a verse that stopped me dead in mid thought. 

 

 “And he that doubteth is damned if he eat, because he eateth not of faith: for whatsoever is not of faith is sin.”  Romans 14:23

 

I was thinking that I was a good person who really didn’t deserve to go to Hell.  I was doubting God’s word, which meant I was condemned.  I wasn’t putting my faith in Him, which meant I was sinning. 

 

My realization was this:  I am a sinner and I am condemned.

 

The Lord showed me quite clearly through this verse that even though I was born into a Christian home and in my thinking I was a “good” person, I was still a sinner deserving damnation.  I deserved to go to Hell for all the sin that I had committed.  I had no hope in Heaven because my sins were sending me to Hell.  I was frantic.  I didn’t want to go to Hell – even if I deserved it.  The Bible says that God cannot let sin enter Heaven. I was full of sin.  I earnestly started going over verses that I had memorized, crying to the Lord to save me.  Then this verse came to mind that I had memorized years before in Sunday School: 

 

“For He was wounded for my transgressions, He was bruised for my iniquities, the chastisement for our peace was upon Him and with His stripes we are healed.”  Isaiah 53:5

 

I love this verse!  Jesus Christ was wounded for my sins and because Jesus Christ, the sinless Savior, died for my sins, I am healed!  He took the judgment of God for my sin.  I am healed because Jesus bore my judgment on the cross.  Because of His death and resurrection I am free!!  I am Heaven bound – whether I die or if the Lord comes back – which ever comes first!

 

It took me about a week to tell anyone about that Monday night on January 11, 1999.  I wanted to make sure I had it for sure this time!  The Lord gave me this verse as assurance:

 

“These things I have written to you who believe in the name of the Son of God, that you may know that you have eternal life.”  1 John 5:13

 

With this assurance, I write today, as a child of God.  Why He died for me, I’m sure I will spend eternity finding out!  I look forward to that!  Until then, I live in this God-forsaken world, the Lord Jesus Christ came to die for and only with His help, I live to prove His name.

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